Effective Communication by Manufacturing Empathy

Posted on March 4, 2017 by Gabe Parmer

Communication with other humans is difficult. Many interactions in academia revolve around either attempting to convey information to others, convincing others of your ideas, learning from others, or critically examining other’s ideas. All of these situations involve information and experience asymmetries – some individuals know more about an area or idea than others. The goal of communication is to increase the total knowledge of all individuals involved. When trying to convince others of your ideas, the goal is also to raise their knowledge to a level where they understand and agree with the value of your approach. This can be quite difficult, and contemplating how to do it effectively is necessary for researchers.

Why is Communication Essential for Research?

First, lets detour and discuss why we care about this. Academia often requires groups of researchers, all attacking a set of shared problems of interest, all approaching the problem from different perspectives. Why is this? The total context, knowledge, and experience of a group of individuals is inherently larger than that of an individual. Though this seems like a sufficient justification for researching in groups, I’ve seen many skeptical students. This skepticism comes from the fact that doing research requires a deep-dive into a topic, and the perception can be that once you have reached a sufficient depth, group interactions lose value. This perspective is dangerously ignorant of two facts:

  1. Any research area requires knowledge in the intersection of a large number of other sub-areas, creating a large venn diagram of research areas. Even if you’re an expert in a few of these areas, others will teach you in their areas that will enhance your understanding in your original area. Ideas are not independent, and exist in an eco-system. Having a group that reflects that eco-system is necessary if we are to do strong research.
  2. Creativity is required for research, and pushing only into the depths of a small set of areas removes one of the most powerful creative tools we have as humans: the ability to change the context we use to look at an idea. If you approach an area from only a single perspective, the set of ideas you’ll generate will start to stagnate over time. New perspectives from other subjects enables your mind to refocus on the problems you’re solving with new context which is a fundamental driver of creativity. Since research in systems is often the product of applying creativity to engineering, and studying it scientifically, you cannot afford to hinder your own creativity.

I hope that this debunks the idea of the effectiveness of the “lone wolf” researcher. At the very least, it should motivate a genuine commitment to being an active member in the broader research group. To foster a group environment where each member can benefit from these factors, see the post on psychological safety.

How to Effectively Communicate

It is deceptively simple to think that because we talk to other humans all day long, and have been doing so for most of our lives, we can effectively communicate in an academic environment. This is generally incorrect. I think it is important to first acknowledge that effective communication is really difficult, especially in deeply technical topics with large information asymmetries. Second, remember that these discussions should be relatively ego-less, thus the goal is not demonstrating knowledge or intelligence, rather growing the level of collective knowledge. In my experience, if someone perceives the goal of interactions as an opportunity to demonstrate knowledge, it ends up being a large waste of everyone’s time.

First, lets focus on some individual factors that we can each to be increase our effectiveness of communicating.

This list of things we can do independent of others to aid in communication is a very small. There isn’t much that you can do to optimize your communication with someone else while only taking yourself and your ideas into account. To most effectively communicate, you need to focus on the other party’s state. To emphasize this fact, a set of examples that show that the requirements on communication vary based on the other party much more than on your or the topic.

Explaining your research. You want to explain your research to

Go through the list, and give a three to six sentence summary of the work you’re doing for each audience. If there is significant overlap in your explanation for many of these categories, you’re doing it wrong.

Understand how a subsystem works. You want to understand how a subsystem of a system that you’re unfamiliar with works, and you ask

How do you state your questions? How do you react and followup to their answers? Again, this should likely deviate for each of these groups.

Explaining a research paper. You explain a paper to

Again, the methods you use should have significant deviation. There are many other examples, but I hope this set makes the point.

These examples demonstrate the pervasive wisdom that you should “know your audience”. This is likely one of the most important aspects of communicating effectively with other people. It takes genuine effort and thought to contemplate what your audience knows, and how to convey your information, or how to state your questions in a manner that is most effective.

Manufacturing Empathy1

Many people associate empathy with a vague notion of sharing another’s feelings. I like a definition that is little bit more concrete:

Empathy is the capacity to understand or feel what another person is experiencing from within the other being’s frame of reference, i.e., the capacity to place oneself in another’s position.

Manufacturing empathy expands on the trite concept of knowing your audience. It is not a passive activity that occurs before you make a presentation, and instead an active activity that you perform while engaged in a community, or a conversation. The point is to always work toward a greater understanding about the other’s perspectives, knowledge, and understanding. This allows you to much more effectively state your concepts or questions in a manner that is understandable, and always advancing the conversation toward greater collective knowledge.

Manufacturing empathy is a tacit acknowledgment that it takes hard work, dedication, and concentration to effectively state your thoughts in a manner that will resonate with and be impactful on other humans. It is motivated by the fact that it is more important to focus on the other person’s understanding of the information, than on the information itself.

Building mental model of other’s state. One way to describe empathy, is that it is concerned with building descriptive mental models of the other’s state and mind. These mental models have a number of dimensions.

So if manufacturing empathy requires an active effort to build and refine your mental models of the other people you’re interacting with, what actions should one take? Techniques for manufacturing empathy include:

All of these mechanisms are methodically building feedback loops into the formation of your mental model of the other person. The other person provides more information to you about their own mental state, and you check this information’s consistency with your model, and refine the model as necessary, often through further interaction. This methodology is counter to a sense of confidence that we can convey complex information easily.

Provide Feedback to Enhance Other’s Empathy

It is the job of each member in a conversation to make sure that each individual achieves their goals. Put another way, your job goes beyond just to saying your piece, or learning what you want. It is important, once you approach your interactions from the perspective of building empathy, to understand that you must enable others to do the same. This is quite a bit easier than building empathy, and largely centers around providing constant feedback on what you believe the state of the conversation is. This takes a number of forms:

Practice

As with any skill, manufacturing empathy takes practice. Research groups often provide this opportunity in a few different ways:

It is important that these initiatives are student-motivated and run so that they have genuine momentum and longevity. Hopefully this provides yet another motivation to organize these events.

Beyond Academia

I’ve framed this discussion in the context of academia. The general technique goes far beyond this context. A number of examples, and I’ll let you expand from there:


  1. I created this term with full knowledge that it is vaguely sociopathic, but I think it is accurate and emphasizes the methodology I’m aiming to convey.↩︎